You release me so that we can open the car door. I look at you, unsure what to do now. You cover my head with your hand and duck me backwards into the car. I am distracted by not falling over and my brain realises what is going on, what we might be about to do. For the first time, I wonder what will happen when this is over, if you will be gone again and I will be left with the sorrow that has consumed me since you went, how I will cope if this is the last time again. I break into a sob and you look at me with concern. I scrunch up into a ball against the far door and you climb into the car and shut the door behind you. Sound from the outside world is shut out; no more breeze stirring the trees, no more noise from the cars on the road outside the car park. The sudden stillness is jarring. I am aware of my clothes, rustling as I breathe in and out, the squeak of the seats beneath us as we sit awkwardly, looking at each other. You shuffle towards me and I look away, tears squeezing from between slitted eyes, too afraid to see that you are here when soon you will be gone again. You touch my face gently but I daren't move.